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New York Picked Last Again

by on April 21, 2011

The most important lesson for children is that the government will protect them from ever getting injured. It’s best that they learn as early as possible that they will always be safe as long as they trust the state.

Unfortunately, the schools can only wimpify our kids during three seasons. What if kids toughened up over the summer?

Don’t worry, as your bureaucrats are working to kill children’s competitive urges throughout the entire year. Indispensable public employees are out to warn us of the danger of playtime. This is from a state that’s the union’s equivalent of the first fat kid banished to the sidelines upon being walloped with a dodgeball:

ALBANY – State bureaucrats have identified a potentially deadly hazard facing our children this summer – freeze tag.

That’s right, officials have decided the age-old street game – along with Wiffle Ball, kickball and dodgeball – poses a “significant risk of injury.”

And classics like Capture the Flag, Steal the Bacon and Red Rover are also deemed dangerous in new state regulations for day camps.

The Albany dateline seems redundant: even Sacramento might not try something so intrusively piffling. As a thank you for their salaries, the hassling specialists are keeping your kids from having fun:

The Health Department created a list of supposedly risky recreational activities – which also includes more perilous pursuits like archery, scuba and horseback riding – in response to a state law passed in 2009.

It’s part of New York’s effort to protect us from the scourge of murderous unregulated camps:

The law sought to close a loophole that legislators said allowed too many indoor camp programs to operate without oversight.

Under the new rules, any program that offers two or more organized recreational activities – with at least one of them on the risky list – is deemed a summer camp and subject to state regulation.

It will cost them. But of course:

Ritchie said the regulations could cripple small recreational programs, forcing them to pay a $200 fee to register as a summer camp and provide medical staff.

Jeez: just let your kids play Xbox all summer. All these camps do is let whippersnappers burn some damn calories, which is an unacceptable waste of energy. It’s safe to wager that the same politicians who think the Health Department is acting withing its jurisdiction also endorse sodie pop taxes and Happy Meal toy bans.

Vacationing kids would miss the ample benefits of supervised red rovering and bacon stealing. For one, they wouldn’t learn about the virtues of competition, specifically in how worthy opponents can inspire the best efforts. They would also miss the joy of preying upon inferior kickball teams.

And they might also be deprived of the chance to learn through games that life is tough. You will lose sometimes, but that’s no excuse to quit while crying or cry while quitting. If you come up short at dodging and are reduced to icing welts after being struck with high-velocity inflated rubber orbs, suck it up and look forward to the next match.

Unfortunately, the state treats those in all age groups the same. Adults are viewed as eternal juveniles by the state’s piddling fascists.

The unceasing spending and regulation that is New York’s trademark is designed to protect us from any contingency, much like they’re doing with camp kids. Insulating people from personal financial responsibility and/or getting an ouchie is necessary for those who were perpetually sheltered as minors.

The most politically correct proposal evah reveals astounding tone deafness. The agency remarkably didn’t anticipate that even a discussion about their rules would make them look silly. But what do they care? It’s not like anyone will be fired for it.

As it stands, the state is encouraging kids to become tragic wusses. They want to ensure brats never build character. Supporters of the state’s most ridiculous bout with meddling since the last one should be forced to do push-ups. Don’t expect any of them will crack double digits.

One Comment
  1. Al Belardinelli permalink

    Being last makes me “Mad As Hell”!
    In May we are holding a “Mad As Hell Rally” at Mountain View Resort in the rolling hills near Monticello, NY to inspire our patriotic movement. Carl Paladino will be addressing many of the ills that plague NYS and America. Hopefully the “Mad As Hell Rally” will help us find ways to find solutions.
    Carl is not doing this for political or personal gain. He is acting as a fellow patriot. If the spirit moves you please send a note (short and sweet) of encouragement to Carl.

    Al Belardinelli

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